This is something I struggle with all the time.
When you figure out that life is more than a series of random events, you’re left with one option: life happens for a reason–or at the very least–you have control of your future. But, when you become aware of the fact, there’s no turning back. Every decision you make and every action you take, it’s you. That means you alone are responsible for the consequences as well.
If I had the aptitude to be an accountant or some type of office worker, perhaps the system will guide me as I go. Unfortunately, it just so happens that everything I’ve ever had a passion for remains firmly in the arts. So you take every opportunity with a grain of salt and continue to take chances wherever it seems fit.
But that’s just it. Reality all too often sinks in before you have time to rejoice. Every opportunity you find becomes the thing that could potentially get you in the door. For me, a healthy college student, life just seems like one big opportunity, shifting and moving everyday. It’s not just writing or academics; everything becomes the thing that could take you to the next level.
And so you set yourself up for disappointment. The more you aspire, the farther your goals become. How else do you stay driven? But, with great expectation also comes the problem of self-fulfillment. You forget to stop and smell the roses. You forget about parties and slacking off and having fun. Suddenly, everything is a test that you have to pass in order to get somewhere better. Every script becomes the masterpiece, and when they’re not, you’re crestfallen just long enough to start all over.
It’s not easy (I would know), but finding a balance between striving to be great and appreciating all the small steps in between definitely equates to your happiness. Otherwise, great expectations will be the only thing you’ll ever know and the feeling of accomplishment can forever escape your grasp. Sometimes the greatest accomplishment is to remember why you began the journey in the first place.
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